All good things must come to an end - I suppose

I had the day off yesterday, so I spent the day scrap booking! It was great...I dropped Ben off at daycare, J.R. was at work, and I created 4 pages for my albums. OK, so I didn't create a lot of pages, but it was still fun nevertheless. My car was inspected and only cost $82.82, so that was good. Ben had a good day at daycare too and stayed in a happy mood all night. So good stuff all around.

However, I've stopped pumping. Sigh. I new this day was coming, but I was hoping not so soon. I really wanted to keep breastfeeding until Ben was 9 months (I wanted 12 months, but I knew my milk production just wouldn't make it). I got to 8 1/2 I guess. Two weeks ago we were still sending 2 bottles of breast milk to daycare. Usually only because one was coming back from the day before, but two were going nonetheless. I thought last week I'd be able to send 1 a day. Nope. We'd put 2 oz in with 4 oz of formula. That's all I could get. By the end of the week, I stopped pumping. Wed. I didn't pump because I went to see Ben at lunchtime and nursed him there, Thurs. I pumped once at 10am, and Friday I didn't pump at all. I left the pump in the car all weekend, and today I didn't even bring it into work. I'm thinking I'll feed him in the morning before we leave the house, I'll feed him once when we get home, and if we wakes up in the middle of the night wanting to eat, I'll breastfeed then. My right side has pretty much dried up. I haven't pumped or fed him from that side in days. It's sad. I'm sad. I feel like I'm letting him down. I know he wants more, but I can't give it to him. Soon, he'll forget, I suppose. I won't though. I'm just really bummed. The first month of breast feeding was tough - toe curling pain tough, and I definitely spent my summer feeling like a cow, but I really enjoy it now. There are times where I want Ben to be hungry so we can spend some alone time together. It's a really cool feeling to know I can do this for him, and no one else can. It's our special bond. And now it's over. At least we did it for a while anyway. Maybe I'll be able to feed him twice a day for a little while yet. That would be good. For me anyway.